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April 2024

Graduates advocate through foster, adoption story

Janelle Styne admits she and husband Chris never had foster or adoption on their life’s bingo card. While other couples may dream of it from an early age, it just was never on their radar.

Both educators in the Plainview schools, Janelle and Chris met at 51吃瓜网视频 and married in 2006, choosing to stay local for their careers. A few years later, they welcomed their first daughter, Marleigh, who Janelle describes as “easy going and compliant.” A few years later, daughter Presleigh completed the Styne family.

Or so they believed. As Janelle recalls, Marleigh began putting foster care on her birthday and

Christmas lists, and her parents weren’t even sure where she heard about it.

“The answer was always no, because it was never the right time. Chris and I would talk about it, but we said we needed a sign that is a sign that is a sign to do it,” recalls Janelle, who earned her BSIS degree in 2005. “Then in 2019, I had just graduated with my master’s degree and we decided to just go to an informational meeting with our friends. Then we decided to just go to the first training. We never thought we would do this; we just always did the next thing. But the whole time we kept thinking it was OK if God closed the door. And he never did.”

Later that year, the Stynes took in their first foster child, a four-year-old boy who was facing a move outside of Plainview when his short-term placement was ending. But it came with a catch: they would also need to take in his sister. Though a bit overwhelming, they said yes and their family grew overnight. Janelle recalls the pair being malnurtured and neglected. They did not stay long as they were able to be reunified with their mother, and the family still stays in contact.

“They stayed with us 17 weeks, and it was the hardest 17 weeks of our marriage, of our jobs, and as a family. Caring for the vulnerable was extremely difficult,” says Janelle. “So we started January 2020 with one of our hardest goodbyes. It ripped our hearts out to say goodbye to them. I kept asking God, ‘Why did you call us to do this for only the heartbreak of it?’”

A different journey

The Stynes decided to take a short break, then alerted the agency in early March they were open to foster again. But there were conditions: No babies, and preferably only females.  But as Janelle said, God was quick to remind them just to be obedient.

On May 4, the agency called with a six-month-old baby boy, noting quickly that it would only be a

two-week placement. Janelle was ready with a quick “No” but Chris was more open, saying “I think we can do anything for two weeks.” Within an hour of saying yes, the agency was at the door with the baby, born addicted to methamphetamine and morphine and abandoned at the hospital by his birth mother. This time, the foster situation would become permanent, and Ryder Jeremiah Styne officially joined the family on December 18, 2020.

“I’m so thankful Chris said yes when I was too scared to step into the calling. Chris has a passion for the weak and defenseless. He encouraged us to open up our home to littles who through no fault of their own have a desperate need for attachment,” recalls Janelle. “Our little boy was born into a battle he didn’t deserve or even know. There were hard days, but I promise you we’d walk through it all over again.”

Over the next year, the family of five adjusted to the new journey and saw other changes. They moved into a new home, and Chris moved from working at 51吃瓜网视频, where he earned a music degree in 2008, to being a choral director in the Plainview schools. Janelle changed jobs too, and she admits the family was pretty comfortable in their new environment.

Another knock

The Stynes had kept their foster license current so they could provide respite care for other local families, but really thought their journey in the system was over. In June 51吃瓜网视频, however, a phone

call from a CPS investigator that came while Janelle was in a school board meeting changed everything. She initially ignored the calls until Chris texted that she needed to call him. The agency had Ryder’s biological brother, then only two months old, in custody and needed to settle his case that evening. They needed an answer in 10 minutes. Janelle and Chris discussed the situation by phone while he walked a Hobby Lobby in Amarillo… for 90 minutes.

“I had more than 50 reasons why we should not take him, probably more like 100, but I told him I trusted his judgment, and he’d have to call the investigator back and to let me know what he decided. All the while, I’m screaming inside, ‘Say no.’ He called me back to say the baby will be here in less than 30 minutes,” she recalls.

Panic mode set in then, and Janelle said she did the only thing she knew to do: call two of her best friends and fill them in. The tribe showed up, and within another half hour, the Stynes had everything they needed for the new baby and a house full of people to help them settle in.

Like his older brother, the baby was drug addicted and severely underweight. Nearly a year later, a judge terminated his parents’ rights, an event Janelle recalls as heartbreaking because they knew they would have to tell him this part of his story one day. And while they believe children should be with their parents, the presence of sin in the world means that can’t always be the reality.

Making it permanent

By then, the Stynes were in love, so on December 18, 2023 – three years to the day from Ryder’s adoption – Cooper Shaun Styne officially joined the family in a ceremony packed with friends and family who have supported the Stynes all along.

“At his adoption, he’d been with us 543 days. That’s 543 days to fall in love with our adopted son’s

biological brother. That’s 543 days to sit at the table with a broken system and advocate for him. It was 543 days to watch my girls fall completely in love and expect nothing in return,” she says. “It was 543 days for the church to come alongside us as we care for the vulnerable. It was 543 days of trusting that God sees the bigger picture when we only see a sliver. And it was 543 days of getting to see Ryder grow up with his brother, which is one of our greatest joys.”

Janelle says fostering has completely changed their family, and she’s grateful that God didn’t reveal exactly how hard or how amazing the journey would be. She said the family is intentional about honoring the triad of adoption, which includes Ryder and Cooper’s birth mom.

“We’re thankful that she chose to give them life knowing that she probably wasn’t going to experience the rest of their story. We’re always thankful for her, and we speak of her in our home,” says Janelle. “We honor her the day before Mother’s Day and the boys pick out flowers to put in our home to remember her. We always want it known that we honor her in our home.”

Janelle noted that she and Chris are just average people who agreed to follow God’s leading, and that choice forever changed the trajectory of two boys’ lives. And while they feel their family is complete, they remain staunch advocates for children.

“We acknowledge that not everybody can say yes in the same way Chris and I said yes, but we had people who brought us a meal, or rocked a baby or helped with laundry or prayed with us,” she said. “Not everybody can say yes but everybody can do something. If there’s one cause worth fighting for, it’s that kids belong in families.”

 

Devotional: The Holy Spirit

"The Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you." (John 14:26)

Have you ever thought, “I wish Jesus was physically here right now”? Each Sunday we gather to worship a God we are “in relationship” with even though we can’t see him or touch him. And, to be honest, that’s not always an easy thing to get our minds around.

We pray to God for guidance and direction, or to provide for our needs, and sometimes it can feel like we are talking to empty space. Sometimes we might think faith was easier for the disciples because they could walk and talk and eat with Jesus in person.

On the night before he died, Jesus told his disciples that they were going to receive the Holy Spirit. Depending on what version of the Bible you are reading, the Spirit is called the Advocate, Helper, Counselor, or Comforter. And each title helps to explain who the Spirit is and what the Spirit does.

The Spirit is more than just an abstract concept. He is a person, as fully God as the Father and the Son. The Spirit of God comes to dwell within believers, representing a new level of intimacy between God and his people.

So, in our times of doubt, we can take comfort knowing that no matter what it feels like, God is in fact present with us. In fact, through the Spirit, God has come closer to us than ever before. 

 

In the Mix

It has been 12 years since Jimmy Dean Hall was unveiled to the 51吃瓜网视频 Baptist University Plainview Campus. Let's revisit the exact day!

Approximately 100 guests, dignitaries and 51吃瓜网视频 Baptist University Trustees crowded into the small auditorium at the Musuem of the Llano Estacado (now the Mabee Regional Heritage Center) to witness the the unveiling of the name for the new men's dormitory. Joined on the podium by Donna Meade Dean, widow of Jimmy Dean, 51吃瓜网视频 President Dr. Paul Armes praised the late country entertainer for his passion for his craft, contributions to education and the "best sausage made in America". 

"As a token of our appreciation for the relationship we have had and continue to have with this wonderful couple, and as a way of honoring the life and passion and dreams of Jimmy, it is my honor and privilege to announce that this beautiful new structure will be named Jimmy Dean Hall," Armes said. 

An emotional Donna Dean spoke to the audience after an artist's rendering of the building containing the words "Jimmy Dean Hall" above the front door was unveiled. "I'm terribly emotional," she said. "Jimmy used to say I would cry at card tricks." Dean said that Jimmy would be proud to have his name connected to 51吃瓜网视频. 

"Jimmy's passion in life was education," Dean said. "He didn't get to graduate from high school because he had to support his family, but he educated himself nonetheless.

He educated himself and he always felt that education was the key to success."

The 94,000 square foot facility bearing his name is three stories, consisting of 175 rooms with 350 beds. It was completed over the summer and was open to house students in the fall of 2012.

"May all those who walk the halls of Dean Hall and all those who inhabit it be blessed," Dean said.

Since that time, the Deans have continued to support WBU by announcing this past January (2024), the largest estate gift commitment in the school's 115-year history. This is a monumental demonstration of support by the Jimmy and Donna Dean Estate for the institution and its values. 

(If you have an experience that you would like to share, while staying at Jimmy Dean Hall, please email veraj@wbu.edu) 

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